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GOD & BELIEF ESSAY · PERSONAL VIEW

What Is My Religion? Not Knowing

Where and when we are born shapes what we believe. That is why the most honest answer I can give about my own religion is not certainty, but “I don’t know.”

What is my religion?

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A dark blue, grainy view of space crossed by faint pale streaks of scattered sunlight. Inside one streak, just right of center, sits a single tiny bright dot: Earth.
NASA/JPL-Caltech (2020 reprocessing of the 1990 Voyager 1 image), via Wikimedia Commons · Public domain · Image source ↗

The shortest answer I can give is this:

Not knowing.

That does not mean I have no values, no wonder, or no interest in the deepest questions. It means I no longer pretend to possess an answer simply because I inherited one.

The accident of birthplace

Imagine changing only one fact about your life: where and when you were born.

If you had been born in ancient Egypt, you might have honored Ra and Osiris.

In ancient Greece, Zeus.

In the Roman world, Jupiter and other gods.

In Viking-age Scandinavia, Odin or Thor.

In India, depending on the century and community, you might have followed Vedic traditions, Hindu traditions, Buddhism, Sikhism, or another path.

In seventh-century Arabia, you might have grown up Muslim. In medieval Europe, Christian. In another family, another century, another village, the answer could change again.

I was born in Mexico, where Catholicism shaped the culture for centuries after arriving with Spanish colonization. The odds were very high that I would be raised Catholic.

And I was.

This does not prove Catholicism—or any religion—is false. Thoughtful people can recognize the influence of birthplace and still keep their faith.

But the pattern taught me something I could not unlearn:

Most of us do not begin by comparing every religion and selecting the one we find best supported. We begin inside a story already being told around us.

Billions of sincere people disagree

Christianity is the world’s largest religion, but most people on Earth are not Christian. Billions of sincere people follow Islam, Hindu traditions, Buddhism, folk religions, other faiths, or no religion at all.

There are thousands of named religious traditions and far more local variations than any list can capture.

The important point is not the exact count.

It is the confidence.

People inside very different traditions often feel the same certainty that their own path is true. Many have powerful experiences, family histories, sacred texts, answered prayers, rituals, and communities supporting that conclusion.

They cannot all be correct in every contradictory detail.

But they can all be sincere.

That distinction matters.

“I don’t know” is not surrender

For much of my life, saying “I don’t know” felt like failure. Religion offered certainty. Doubt felt dangerous.

Now I see uncertainty differently.

“I don’t know” is not the end of thought. It is where honest investigation begins.

Do we know why anything exists at all? No.

Do we know whether reality extends beyond the observable universe? No.

Do we know whether consciousness continues after death? No.

Do we know whether a creator exists outside nature as we understand it? No.

People have beliefs, arguments, experiences, and traditions. Some are sophisticated and meaningful. But belief is not the same thing as demonstrated knowledge.

That boundary protects both faith and science from pretending to be what they are not.

My religion today

So when I say my religion is “not knowing,” I am not trying to build another religion around uncertainty.

I mean that not knowing has become a discipline.

It reminds me to separate what I hope from what I can show. It keeps me from treating my own experience as universal proof. It gives me room to change my mind without feeling that my identity has collapsed.

It also lets me respect the person in front of me.

A believer does not need my permission to believe. An atheist does not need my permission to doubt. We can examine the same evidence and arrive at different philosophical conclusions while still speaking honestly and treating one another with dignity.

The more I learn

The more I learn, the larger my ignorance appears.

That is not false humility. Every answer opens more questions. We map galaxies and discover dark matter. We describe evolution and still debate the origins of life. We measure brain activity and still do not fully understand consciousness.

I no longer expect one lifetime to deliver a final answer.

What I can do is remain curious, examine claims, admit when I am speculating, and correct myself when reality disagrees.

That is where I stand today.

Not empty.

Not certain.

Still looking.

Sources & further reading

(23)
  1. How the Global Religious Landscape Changed From 2010 to 2020 ↗2020: Christians 2.3 billion (28.8%); religiously unaffiliated 1.9 billion (24.2%); Hindus 1.2 billion (14.9%); Buddhists 324 million (4.1%); Muslims 25.6%.
  2. Globally, Islam grew faster than all other religions from 2010-2020 ↗Muslims increased by 347 million to 2.0 billion; second-largest religious group after Christians.
  3. Así reaccionó la Iglesia Católica ante los más de 10 millones de ateos en México revelados por Inegi ↗In 2020, 77.7 percent of Mexico's population was Catholic (97.8 million people), down from 82.7 percent in 2010.
  4. Catholic Church in Mexico ↗The Church's history in Mexico dates from the Spanish conquest of the Aztec Empire (1519-1521).
  5. Vedic period ↗c. 1500-c. 500 BCE; early Upanishads completed in the later Vedic age (c. 1000-600 BCE); Vedic religion later part of the Hindu synthesis.
  6. Brahman ↗The highest universal principle, the ultimate reality; developed from Vedic ritual meaning into the Upanishadic concept.
  7. Osiris ↗First evidence of Osiris worship from the middle of the Fifth Dynasty (25th century BCE); lord of the dead and the underworld.
  8. Shangdi ↗Supreme power for the Shang dynasty elite; earliest references in Shang oracle bones of the 2nd millennium BC.
  9. Guan Yu ↗General of the late Eastern Han, executed in early 220; deified as early as the Sui dynasty (581-618) and still worshipped.
  10. Old Norse religion ↗Practiced from the Iron Age through the Viking Age; Christianization in the 10th-11th centuries; most written sources on Odin and Thor from the 13th century.
  11. Zeus ↗Attested in Mycenaean Linear B; king of the gods in Homer and Hesiod (8th-7th centuries BC).
  12. Temple of Jupiter Optimus Maximus ↗Traditionally dedicated in 509 BC; the most important temple in ancient Rome.
  13. The Buddha ↗Lived in the eastern Indo-Gangetic Plain in the 6th or 5th century BCE.
  14. Muhammad ↗First revelation in 610 at the cave of Hira near Mecca, Arabia.
  15. Guru Nanak ↗1469-1539; born in present-day Nankana Sahib, Punjab (now Pakistan); founder of Sikhism.
  16. About Sikhs ↗More than 25 million Sikhs worldwide; founded over 500 years ago in the Punjab region of South Asia.
  17. List of religions and spiritual traditions ↗According to some estimates, roughly 4,200 religions, churches, denominations and faith groups; the count depends on definitions.
  18. Why Do Humans Keep Inventing Gods to Worship? ↗States that anthropologists estimate at least 18,000 gods, goddesses, animals or objects have been worshipped; no specific study cited, so the essay hedges it.
  19. Upanishads ↗Olivelle: the Brihadaranyaka and Chandogya, the two earliest, may be placed in the 7th to 6th centuries BCE, give or take a century; Brahman as the ultimate reality.
  20. Venus (mythology) ↗First known temple to Venus (Venus Obsequens) dedicated in 295 BC near the Aventine Hill.
  21. Pale Blue Dot Revisited ↗Taken February 14, 1990, from about 3.8 billion miles (6 billion kilometers); reprocessed in 2020. Used for the image caption.
  22. Ra ↗Ancient Egyptian sun god; became a state deity in the Fifth Dynasty (25th and 24th centuries BC).
  23. Viking Age ↗About 800-1050 CE.

#Belief#doubt#humility#religion#world religions

Portrait of Ricardo Maldonado

Ricardo Maldonado, founder and editor of God Plays Dice.
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